Beyond Online Connections
We are more connected than ever. Facebook, Twitter and Linkedin has shrunk our world. Yet despite all these statistics for divorce, separations and people who feel isolated don't show signs of abating. That's because connectedness is useless unless it turns into community.
A community is characterized by these three A's:
ACCEPTANCE. Genuine community is about accepting people for who they are. I accepted each of my children for who God created them to be. Each child is unique and is distinct from the other. This is how families are and how churches should be if they are to be the communities God has ordained them to be. They are marked by impartiality, they accept people regardless of their background, skin color, age, political views and yes even their sexual inclinations. Churches should welcome everyone for who they are.
Acceptance however does not mean that people should stay they way they are. I accepted my children for who God made them to be but I also made sure that I discipled them for who God destined them to be. I accepted them as babies but did not allow them to stay that way.
AFFIRMATION. Anyone who has been retweeted or whose post was liked on Facebook knows how good it feels to be affirmed. But that is surface level affirmation. Genuine affirmation comes from those who know us for who we truly are, the good, the bad and the ugly and yet continue to affirm us with their friendship and relationship. This is one of the values of family and community.
When we lack affirmation from those who are closest to us we will seek it from the larger world around us. Affirmation is what creates a quiet confidence and an inner security inside of us. We don't have to prove ourselves. This is why churches need small groups. For it is here where moments of affirmation naturally happen as people relate with one another.
AFFECTION. And while we can have hundreds of friends and followers on the internet it lacks the ability to give us affection. The gentle touch, the sincere ear complete with eye contact, the mention of our names, the prayer of faith, the idea that we're not just a number. Herein lies the magic of community.
The family is our primary small group. But as we know not all of us have families to provide us with community. This brings us to God's ordained community when family fails us, the Church. The place where people are available to us, where we are accepted for we are, where we are affirmed and where we experience affection.
The implication of this is two fold: Our families are the default community God has ordained for people. But just as important is that we the Church should represent these attributes of community. So that others may experience acceptance, affirmation and affection. Facebook, Twitter and Linkedin are great but unless they turn us into communities they remain nothing but online connections.
"If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honored, every part rejoices with it. Now you are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it." 1Corinthians 12:26-27
My Comments Policy
While my site offers visitors the ability to converse, I have a few ground rules so that our conversations will remain civil and courteous.
1. You must register in order to leave a comment. I don’t entertain pseudo, anonymous or bogus individuals. This site is my home (it has a Home Page, get it). I don’t let strangers who don’t introduce themselves into my home.
2. I love questions. I love them because a lot of times they are similar to someone else’s questions and can even trigger other questions from others. Questions also keep us all sharp. This is also why I respond to them as best as I can and at the soonest possible time. I believe that group answering benefits more people than private email exchanges.
3. We don’t have to agree. Debates are welcome. However, whether it is with me or any other visitors of my site, my rule is this: disagree if you must but keep things civil. That’s just how I run my home, and you are a visitor here. No shouting; I have seen it done in writing. No cursing and no insulting.
4. I reserve the right to delete your comments. Like I said, this is my home. I do not have an obligation to publish your comments. As a human being, you may enjoy the freedom to express your opinions on your own site but not on mine. To be specific, I will delete your comments if you post content that is in my sole opinion: (a) snarky; (b) off-topic; (c) libelous, defamatory, abusive, harassing, threatening, profane, pornographic, offensive, false, misleading, or which otherwise violates or encourages others to violate my sense of decorum, civility or any law, including intellectual property laws; or (d) “spam,” i.e. an attempt to advertise, solicit, or otherwise promote goods and services. You may, however, post a link to your site or your most recent blog entry.
5. You retain ownership of your comments. I do not own them and I expressly disclaim any and all liability that may result from them. By commenting on my site, you agree that you retain all ownership rights in what you post here and that you will relieve me from any and all liability that may result from those posts.
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In short, my goal is to host interesting conversations with caring, honest, and respectful people. I believe this clear and simple comments policy will facilitate this.
